I see us in the park
strolling the summer days
of imaginings in my head.
And words from our hearts
told only to the winds
felt even without being said.
I don't want to bore you with my trouble
But there's something 'bout your love
that makes me weak and knocks me off my feet.
There's something 'bout your love
that makes me weak and knocks me off my feet
knocks me off my feet.
I don't want to bore you with it
oh but I love you
I love you
I love you.
I don't want to bore you with it
oh but I love you
I love you
I love you more and more.
We lay beneath the stars
under a lover's tree
that's seen through the eyes of my mind.
And I reach out for the part
of me that lives in you
that only our two hearts can find.
I don't want to bore you with my trouble
But there's something 'bout your love
that makes me weak and knocks me off my feet.
There's something 'bout your love
that makes me weak and knocks me off my feet
knocks me off my feet.
I don't want to bore you with it
but I love you
I love you
I love you.
I don't want to bore you with it
but I love you
I love you ...
Sunday, March 28, 2004
Monday, March 22, 2004
Java in Manila 2
I was rushed to the ER yesterday due to severe stomachache. i hope this is nothing serious. mom and pops and HH panicked when i was crying in pain. doctor said im still under observation.
Today is Java in Manila 2 Conference. My team and i are goin to Hotel Intercon. It will be a whole day event. Hope i dont experience any attack today.
Today is Java in Manila 2 Conference. My team and i are goin to Hotel Intercon. It will be a whole day event. Hope i dont experience any attack today.
Wednesday, March 17, 2004
My Sacrifice
another busy day today. HH will pick me up later. yahoo! im having some backaches right now. i dont know why. i guess ive gone through so much stress the past few days that's why im having this backache. i finished my tasks for today. im just waiting for another task to be assigned to me. i feel tired!
Thursday, March 11, 2004
BEING TWENTY - SOMETHING
They call it the "Quarter-life Crisis." It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are many things about yourself that you didn't know and may not like. You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now. You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren't exactly the greatest people you have ever met, and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones. What you don't recognize is that they are realizing that too, and aren't really cold, catty, mean or insincere, but that they are as confused as you. You look at your job... and it is not even close to what you thought you would be doing, or maybe you are looking for a job and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and that scares you. Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and are constantly adding things to your list of what is acceptable and what isn't. One minute, you are insecure and then the next, secure. You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life. You feel alone and scared and confused. Suddenly, change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life, but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away, and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward. You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you. Or you lie in bed and wonder why you can't meet anyone decent enough that you want to get to know better. Or maybe you love someone but love someone else too and cannot figure out why you are doing this because you know that you aren't a bad person. One night stands and random hook ups start to look cheap. Getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic. You go through the same emotions and questions over and over, and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision. You worry about loans, money, the future and making a life for yourself... and while winning the race would be great, right now you'd just like to be a contender! What you may not realize is that everyone reading this relates to it. We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out. Grabe ang hirap pag tumatanda ka na!
Tuesday, March 09, 2004
Congratulations Kay!
Friday, March 5, 2004, was the wedding shower of my friend Kay. Her party was pretty wholesome because the stag party for her fiancee will also be held on the same venue. We had a few drinks and some were already tipsy. Her mom cooked lots of food for the party. Some of our friends were there.
Saturday, March 6, 2004, Geni picked me up from the house. we went to the wedding rehearsal for sunday. it was held at the fort where the wedding will take place. The pastor gave us directions on what to do during the ceremonies. After the practice, kay and harry invited us to eat at pizza hut. Geni and i left around 6:30pm and went to geni's house. I stayed there and checked his kuya's pet fish. the flowerhorn was really cute. it was so playful. whenever you put your finger near the glass of his fish tank, it would follow your finger anywhere it goes.
Last Sunday, March 7, 2004, was the wedding of my college bestfriend kay. she's as old as i am. she married really early. until now im still having a hard time calling her my bestfriend after what had happened to us few years ago. It was a garden wedding at the Kasalikasan in the Fort. It was a nice place with terraces and a lot of plants. The food was great! Their caterer was Dexie's. I really love the lengua and the tempura. Too bad i wasnt able to eat a lot because i was wearing a gown and i was pretty much worried that the zipper might explode!hahaha. Anyways, it was a nice party. The ceremony was pretty long. My foot was already aching when it ended. HH was with me during the party. Our friends also attended the wedding: Gabs, Ge, Huggy, Risa, Anne & Eric, Geni & Steven. We shared one table during the reception. We were the noisiest table there. We kept on laughing at the singer and the emcee. Kay kept on making faces during the whole ceremony and the reception. Anne and I were asked to give a message to the newly weds during reception. Kay cried a lot after anne and I spoke. I really hope she'll be happy na.
Sunday morning, I was really worried because i havent gotten my gown yet from kay's house. HH promised me that he'll accompany me to get my gown. HH came to my house an hour late so we had to hurry to Kay's house to get my gown. It was so unlucky of us that we got caught in a traffic in cubao. Grrr! God i hate traffics! Gabs, by the way, joined us on our way to the wedding. When we got to HH's salon in jupiter, we were both shocked to know that the stylist i was scheduled to have my hair done is absent. So HH was already panicking. i tried to keep my cool. HH's mom said she'll be the one to fix my hair. Great! She started setting my hair with curlers. HH's stepdad took charge of my make-up. Talk about a family of beauty stylists! Kuya Loi (HH's stepdad) did great with my make-up. He also fixed my hair to have an upstyle. He put some colored stones on my hair. It looked really great. After the salon stuff, i hurried to change to my gown then we left for the party in the Fort. Thankyou Tita Lucy and Kuya Loi! Btw, since HH owns the salon, all the services i got were free. I just love HH for that!
After the reception, Geni, Steven, Gabs, Huggy, HH and I decided to have coffee so we could talk. I had a great time having coffee with them. I thought Steven (Geni's bf) was quiet but he turned out to be really madaldal and funny. Huggy kept on asking stuff about HH's salon since Huggy was a client in one of their branches. Gabs was pretty quiet that night. HH told them stories about his mom and stepdad. It was really a fun night. Wish we could go out again but this time i hope we're not wearing gowns in a coffeeshop. I hate too much attention! People kept on looking at us. Hahaha
Saturday, March 6, 2004, Geni picked me up from the house. we went to the wedding rehearsal for sunday. it was held at the fort where the wedding will take place. The pastor gave us directions on what to do during the ceremonies. After the practice, kay and harry invited us to eat at pizza hut. Geni and i left around 6:30pm and went to geni's house. I stayed there and checked his kuya's pet fish. the flowerhorn was really cute. it was so playful. whenever you put your finger near the glass of his fish tank, it would follow your finger anywhere it goes.
Last Sunday, March 7, 2004, was the wedding of my college bestfriend kay. she's as old as i am. she married really early. until now im still having a hard time calling her my bestfriend after what had happened to us few years ago. It was a garden wedding at the Kasalikasan in the Fort. It was a nice place with terraces and a lot of plants. The food was great! Their caterer was Dexie's. I really love the lengua and the tempura. Too bad i wasnt able to eat a lot because i was wearing a gown and i was pretty much worried that the zipper might explode!hahaha. Anyways, it was a nice party. The ceremony was pretty long. My foot was already aching when it ended. HH was with me during the party. Our friends also attended the wedding: Gabs, Ge, Huggy, Risa, Anne & Eric, Geni & Steven. We shared one table during the reception. We were the noisiest table there. We kept on laughing at the singer and the emcee. Kay kept on making faces during the whole ceremony and the reception. Anne and I were asked to give a message to the newly weds during reception. Kay cried a lot after anne and I spoke. I really hope she'll be happy na.
Sunday morning, I was really worried because i havent gotten my gown yet from kay's house. HH promised me that he'll accompany me to get my gown. HH came to my house an hour late so we had to hurry to Kay's house to get my gown. It was so unlucky of us that we got caught in a traffic in cubao. Grrr! God i hate traffics! Gabs, by the way, joined us on our way to the wedding. When we got to HH's salon in jupiter, we were both shocked to know that the stylist i was scheduled to have my hair done is absent. So HH was already panicking. i tried to keep my cool. HH's mom said she'll be the one to fix my hair. Great! She started setting my hair with curlers. HH's stepdad took charge of my make-up. Talk about a family of beauty stylists! Kuya Loi (HH's stepdad) did great with my make-up. He also fixed my hair to have an upstyle. He put some colored stones on my hair. It looked really great. After the salon stuff, i hurried to change to my gown then we left for the party in the Fort. Thankyou Tita Lucy and Kuya Loi! Btw, since HH owns the salon, all the services i got were free. I just love HH for that!
After the reception, Geni, Steven, Gabs, Huggy, HH and I decided to have coffee so we could talk. I had a great time having coffee with them. I thought Steven (Geni's bf) was quiet but he turned out to be really madaldal and funny. Huggy kept on asking stuff about HH's salon since Huggy was a client in one of their branches. Gabs was pretty quiet that night. HH told them stories about his mom and stepdad. It was really a fun night. Wish we could go out again but this time i hope we're not wearing gowns in a coffeeshop. I hate too much attention! People kept on looking at us. Hahaha
CAN YOU EVER BE FRIENDS WITH YOUR EX?
Im not sure if ive already posted this forwarded mail in my blog. i just cant seem to find it anymore. anyways, it might help some people that's why im posting it again. happy reading!
Although it would make things much easier in the dating world, relationships rarely see mutual breakups. One person is usually the heartbreaker, while the other mulls over the breakup and pain for weeks, even months. It's never easy to break up with someone you've shared good times with (and even if they were bad times, they were still times). But the person who does the breaking up feels like less of a bad guy by offering that sense of truce: "It's not you, it's me. We'll still be friends, right?" This peace offering of friendship provides the dumper with the solace of knowing they aren't such a horrible person because they still want to be friends with their ex.
I've created a monster
Not only does it give the dumper the comfort of knowing they aren't monsters, but by wanting to remain friends, it also allows the dumper to feel that their former lover will still be in their life, and they won't have to miss having them around. So now the dumper can move on with their life with ease, and with the pleasure of having coffee with their former mate every so often -- but the ex whose heart was ripped out and chewed up by the person who keeps leaving them friendly messages and e-mail isn't a happy camper.
Obviously, these messages on the machine and coffee dates don't last long, and if they do, they end even worse than the breakup. Yes, being friends with an ex-lover is an impossible feat: find out why. Exes must stay that way.
You've Seen Each Other Naked
Although it may be possible to have casual sex with a friend, even this can damage a relationship. As hard as it is to accept, it's difficult to bring a relationship back to its normal state after having been most intimate with someone. You will alwa! ys have an image of that person naked, and memories of the trysts will always be triggered by the smell of her skin or perfume, or even by hearing a song that you once made passionate love to.
And as thick-skinned as you are, it's hard to see the person in the same light after being entangled in each other's skin and sharing a moment of sheer ecstasy with one another. Why else can't exes become friends?
You Can't Confide In Each Other
As hard as two exes try to stay friends, they can never really confide in one another other. How do you tell your ex that you have a hot date tonight, or that you and your new lover are going away on a steamy getaway? You can't even tell your ex that the reason you're smiling so much is because a woman has just pleasured you like never before.
You can tell her these things, but new lovers and mates are always going to be a sensitive issue. It's even harder to tell her how hurt you were that your date stood you up the other night, thanks to your sense of pride. Remaining friends seems to provide us with the security blanket that the person who has been in our life will still be there, and we can call on them every once in a while to find out how they are -- but we'll never actually know how they really are.
Always One-Sided Bitterness
Since breakups are rarely one-sided, one party will always feel resentment or bitterness towards the other person. Even if your ex is feigning friendship, she's not sincerely your friend; so if it seems like plans with your new potential woman are always being sabotaged, they just might be.
Jealousy Comes Into Play
And where there's bitterness, there's jealousy. And the truth of the matter is, it's hard to be sincerely happy for your ex when they've just found the new love of their life.
You Don't Want Them With Anyone Else
It's human nature to be jealous or resentful when our ex finds a new person to cuddle up to, even if we don't have feelings for them anymore. It almost becomes a race of who will find the new lover first, a challenge especially brought on by the person who was dumped. Even for the person who did the breaking up, the thought of someone else taking your place in the memories that you and your ex shared is hard, and sometimes extremely painful to fathom.
Passion Still Exists
Even if your relationship was completely problem-ridden, chances are that the passion and sexual chemistry between the two of you still exists (unless lack of attraction was the reason for your breakup). This is a recipe for disaster because it means that every time you get together under this new "friendship" premise, the lust and passion you have makes it more likely that you'll end up in "one more" night of unbridled "goodbye" sex, for old times sake. This brings you right ! back to square one -- how you felt right after your breakup, and just when you were doing so well.
Moving on
Leaving the past behind is hard enough, and you don't want part of your past still programmed in your cell phone. Although it's easier for the dumper, recovering from a breakup is still a hard thing to do since it means being single again, getting back into the dating scene, and no longer making that daily goodnight call you and your ex used to share.
But having that person still lingering in your life as a constant reminder makes it even harder to move on with your life, meet new people and turn a fresh page. It's almost like keeping one foot in the past, and another struggling to make it back into the pickup scene. It also might be a better idea to leave things with pleasant memories of the other person, rather than drag the potentially doomed relationship through the mud.
In a perfect world, the ideal would be for exes to succeed at being friends, but in one where bitterness, jealousy, passion, and human nature exceed reasoning and rational thought, it's impossible. So unless the two of you were the best of friends before; both broke up on the same terms in a perfectly mutual breakup; both have no qualms about either of you seeing new people, and have both instilled a total honesty policy, better to leave the friendship behind... along with the memories.
Although it would make things much easier in the dating world, relationships rarely see mutual breakups. One person is usually the heartbreaker, while the other mulls over the breakup and pain for weeks, even months. It's never easy to break up with someone you've shared good times with (and even if they were bad times, they were still times). But the person who does the breaking up feels like less of a bad guy by offering that sense of truce: "It's not you, it's me. We'll still be friends, right?" This peace offering of friendship provides the dumper with the solace of knowing they aren't such a horrible person because they still want to be friends with their ex.
I've created a monster
Not only does it give the dumper the comfort of knowing they aren't monsters, but by wanting to remain friends, it also allows the dumper to feel that their former lover will still be in their life, and they won't have to miss having them around. So now the dumper can move on with their life with ease, and with the pleasure of having coffee with their former mate every so often -- but the ex whose heart was ripped out and chewed up by the person who keeps leaving them friendly messages and e-mail isn't a happy camper.
Obviously, these messages on the machine and coffee dates don't last long, and if they do, they end even worse than the breakup. Yes, being friends with an ex-lover is an impossible feat: find out why. Exes must stay that way.
You've Seen Each Other Naked
Although it may be possible to have casual sex with a friend, even this can damage a relationship. As hard as it is to accept, it's difficult to bring a relationship back to its normal state after having been most intimate with someone. You will alwa! ys have an image of that person naked, and memories of the trysts will always be triggered by the smell of her skin or perfume, or even by hearing a song that you once made passionate love to.
And as thick-skinned as you are, it's hard to see the person in the same light after being entangled in each other's skin and sharing a moment of sheer ecstasy with one another. Why else can't exes become friends?
You Can't Confide In Each Other
As hard as two exes try to stay friends, they can never really confide in one another other. How do you tell your ex that you have a hot date tonight, or that you and your new lover are going away on a steamy getaway? You can't even tell your ex that the reason you're smiling so much is because a woman has just pleasured you like never before.
You can tell her these things, but new lovers and mates are always going to be a sensitive issue. It's even harder to tell her how hurt you were that your date stood you up the other night, thanks to your sense of pride. Remaining friends seems to provide us with the security blanket that the person who has been in our life will still be there, and we can call on them every once in a while to find out how they are -- but we'll never actually know how they really are.
Always One-Sided Bitterness
Since breakups are rarely one-sided, one party will always feel resentment or bitterness towards the other person. Even if your ex is feigning friendship, she's not sincerely your friend; so if it seems like plans with your new potential woman are always being sabotaged, they just might be.
Jealousy Comes Into Play
And where there's bitterness, there's jealousy. And the truth of the matter is, it's hard to be sincerely happy for your ex when they've just found the new love of their life.
You Don't Want Them With Anyone Else
It's human nature to be jealous or resentful when our ex finds a new person to cuddle up to, even if we don't have feelings for them anymore. It almost becomes a race of who will find the new lover first, a challenge especially brought on by the person who was dumped. Even for the person who did the breaking up, the thought of someone else taking your place in the memories that you and your ex shared is hard, and sometimes extremely painful to fathom.
Passion Still Exists
Even if your relationship was completely problem-ridden, chances are that the passion and sexual chemistry between the two of you still exists (unless lack of attraction was the reason for your breakup). This is a recipe for disaster because it means that every time you get together under this new "friendship" premise, the lust and passion you have makes it more likely that you'll end up in "one more" night of unbridled "goodbye" sex, for old times sake. This brings you right ! back to square one -- how you felt right after your breakup, and just when you were doing so well.
Moving on
Leaving the past behind is hard enough, and you don't want part of your past still programmed in your cell phone. Although it's easier for the dumper, recovering from a breakup is still a hard thing to do since it means being single again, getting back into the dating scene, and no longer making that daily goodnight call you and your ex used to share.
But having that person still lingering in your life as a constant reminder makes it even harder to move on with your life, meet new people and turn a fresh page. It's almost like keeping one foot in the past, and another struggling to make it back into the pickup scene. It also might be a better idea to leave things with pleasant memories of the other person, rather than drag the potentially doomed relationship through the mud.
In a perfect world, the ideal would be for exes to succeed at being friends, but in one where bitterness, jealousy, passion, and human nature exceed reasoning and rational thought, it's impossible. So unless the two of you were the best of friends before; both broke up on the same terms in a perfectly mutual breakup; both have no qualms about either of you seeing new people, and have both instilled a total honesty policy, better to leave the friendship behind... along with the memories.
Tuesday, March 02, 2004
Countdown
10 IMPORTANT THINGS IN YOUR BAG(10 IS THE HIGHEST)
1. wallet
2. cellphone
3. kikay kit
4. cologne
5. tissue
6. ofc ID
7. sunglasses
8. coin purse
9. ballpen
10. umbrella
9 THINGS YOU WEAR EVERYDAY
1. pants
2. shirt
3. undies
4. jewelries
5. hair clip
6. pointed shoes
7. belt
8. cologne
9. socks
8 OF YOUR FAVORITE FOODS
1. taho
2. dimsum
3. seafood pasta
4. mushrooms
5. cafe mocha
6. hot rings
7. sago/gulaman
8. california maki
7 OF YOUR CLOSEST FRIENDS(TERS)(THOSE ON YOUR FRIENDSTER ACCOUNT)
1. HH
2. ate jing
3. kay
4. gabs
5. geni
6. ronald
7. karen
6 OF YOUR FAVORITE MOVIES
1. Something's Gotta Give
2. Lord of the Rings 3
3. Final Fantasy : The Spirits With In (1st movie ive seen with HH)
4. Monsters Inc.
5. Pirates of the Carribean
6. Matrix
5 THINGS IN YOUR ROOM
1. bed
2. pillows
3. clothes
4. abubot stuff / kalat
5. clock
4 THINGS YOU ATE TODAY
1. rice
2. curried veggies
3. egg chocolates from finland
4. waffle from amsterdam
3 THINGS YOU COULD NOT LIVE WITHOUT:
1. money
2. cellphone
3. water
2 BOOKS/MAGAZINE YOU RECENTLY READ
1. Rich Dad, Poor Dad
2. Seventeen Mag (from the salon)
1 PERSON YOU CAN'T GO A DAY WITHOUT MENTIONING
1. HH
1. wallet
2. cellphone
3. kikay kit
4. cologne
5. tissue
6. ofc ID
7. sunglasses
8. coin purse
9. ballpen
10. umbrella
9 THINGS YOU WEAR EVERYDAY
1. pants
2. shirt
3. undies
4. jewelries
5. hair clip
6. pointed shoes
7. belt
8. cologne
9. socks
8 OF YOUR FAVORITE FOODS
1. taho
2. dimsum
3. seafood pasta
4. mushrooms
5. cafe mocha
6. hot rings
7. sago/gulaman
8. california maki
7 OF YOUR CLOSEST FRIENDS(TERS)(THOSE ON YOUR FRIENDSTER ACCOUNT)
1. HH
2. ate jing
3. kay
4. gabs
5. geni
6. ronald
7. karen
6 OF YOUR FAVORITE MOVIES
1. Something's Gotta Give
2. Lord of the Rings 3
3. Final Fantasy : The Spirits With In (1st movie ive seen with HH)
4. Monsters Inc.
5. Pirates of the Carribean
6. Matrix
5 THINGS IN YOUR ROOM
1. bed
2. pillows
3. clothes
4. abubot stuff / kalat
5. clock
4 THINGS YOU ATE TODAY
1. rice
2. curried veggies
3. egg chocolates from finland
4. waffle from amsterdam
3 THINGS YOU COULD NOT LIVE WITHOUT:
1. money
2. cellphone
3. water
2 BOOKS/MAGAZINE YOU RECENTLY READ
1. Rich Dad, Poor Dad
2. Seventeen Mag (from the salon)
1 PERSON YOU CAN'T GO A DAY WITHOUT MENTIONING
1. HH
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