Monotony Could Be A Good Thing

Monotony is good. Repeat after me... "monotony is good". Woooozzzzaaaaah.

Here's my dilemma... I have been working for this company for a total of 4 years and 2 days (as of today), 3 years and 11 months as a consultant and 11.5 months as an internal employee. I think this is by far the longest running project I have ever been into. It's been too monotonous that it is starting to kill me. You see, I spent most of my life being a consultant which meant I have been jumping to and from projects every 3-6 months, sometimes even in a few weeks. I am not used to doing the same thing over and over. I like mind-twisting problems to solve and challenging projects to deliver. I breathe stress you know! I feel that being "stuck" in this job scares the hell out of me because I might get used to monotony and once an opportunity comes to jump to another boat, I might choose to let it go just because I feel more comfortable with monotony. I don't want to be one of those robot internal employees who just gets old in the same job and gets promoted out of tenure not because they did an excellent job in their field. I still have 50+ years ahead of me (yes, I plan to work til I die. Haha.) and I feel like I am not ready for a "retirement" job, as what I call it.

Paycheck aside, I don't think I have anything else to gain in this current job. I feel like I have nothing more to learn from this team. Hayyyy....

Maybe boring is a good thing. This could mean God wants me to focus on having a kid instead of stressing at work. Or not! Haha. Something in me wants this safe, boring and monotonous life but another thing in me says I have to continue pursuing my dreams even after marriage. It's just complicated.